Logitech X-530The next time we go to someone's house and that person starts bragging about how many MP3s he has and then requires us to listen to his favorite songs on shitty computer speakers we're going to lose it. You wouldn't install suspension and then drive on stock rims, right? Logitech puts the performance on your machine with its X-530 speaker system.
Sony DVD 400-DISC HDMI DVD/SA-CD ChangerHoly shit, how come nobody told us you could buy a 400-disc DVD player? Now if only I could figure out how to scam that many DVDs from Netflix to fill the machine without having it randomly jump to some odd Swedish pornography while my parents are visiting. Technology is a gift and a curse, and Sony is just ushering in the end times.
Oakley ThumpOK we couldn't resist anymore. When these first dropped we thought it was the dumbest thing Oakley had done since the company told cops its glasses would make their feelings of love toward other men go away. But now we get it! These MP3-playing glasses are the perfect design to make your parents go crazy. Not only are you not looking at them but also you aren't even looking like you are listening. The only thing your dad will hate more than the glasses is the poster of your new idol, Lil'John, wearing them. Genius! A+
LG F9100We don't know what it is but we have to find phones with QWERTY keyboards now. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I'm impatient as hell and I have insanely large fingers (ladies you can call anytime). The text-message thing is cool because I don't have to talk to jackasses, but it sucks because it takes five minutes to type "eat a bowl of duck" or something like that. The new LG is going to make my antisocial rhetoric more streamlined but not any more charming.
Samsung YEPP YH-999 PMC (20GB)I have this friend (no really, it's not me) who carries around images of his girl like a new mother carries pictures of her baby. Every time I see that guy (stop; it's not me) he opens his phone so I can look at some girl he is dating in gnarly positions. The fact that he does weird shit like that doesn't bug me as much as the always-shitty image quality. If you are going to have show-and-tell with that sort of thing make sure the quality is good or else it's just dirty.